Upside down

One of the reasons I couldn't wait to go to California, besides the fact that I daydream about it all the time after reading Joan Didion, was that I wanted inspiration. I wanted a kick in the pants so that I could come back to Colorado and feel something more. I guess a bit of refreshment. I wanted inspiration in a million ways. I thought for sure I would get some writing ideas. I did, but the ideas stayed in my head, stretched out to become actually interesting but I didn't write anything down. Then I came home to two rejection letters for one of my poems. The first one came on a Sunday nite. I felt this strong sadness for most of the nite, kind of like how you feel after you have let something really amazing go. Which kinda shocked me, cuz it was just a rejection letter! The second came in the morning, before starting work. Each time I thought about my English teacher from high school. He had a whole wall of his classroom covered in rejection letters. I thought it was odd, cool and a little pretentious. Why did he want everyone to know? After I received mine, I wanted to tell everyone, even strangers. Crazy how something that you don't understand at one point in your life makes total sense once it actually happens.

Steven surprised me with the loveliest present of all time on my birthday. Here it is:



I am dying to use it.

Some things to look forward to:

Albuquerque end of October
Planning a menu for Thanksgiving
Austin in December
Avidly searching for something new
Cooking more on week nites
Writing a letter to someone I really, really admire

Book of the week: A Gate at the Stairs by Loorie Moore
Album of the week: Two Dancers by Wild Beasts
Moment of the week: changing colors alongside beautiful scents